Lifting My Eyes

Sometimes when people hear about what the Lord is doing in our family they make a statement:  “I could never do that.”  The truth is that without Him, we can’t either.  Sometimes we stride, sometimes we stumble, but always the ground is taken one step at a time. When I’m struggling, the best thing for me to do is to pick up my pen and journal.  There’s something about putting my thoughts down on paper that makes it easier to sort the good from the bad.  The Spirit led me to let you peek at one of my rough spots as a big hug when the path ahead seems difficult.  It may not always be easy, but He is always good.  When my heart lifts its gaze up from the rocks in the way, I can see His rainbow of love over my life again.

Friday, November 16th, 2012

Lord, it hit me tonight so quickly that it almost took my breath away:  [In this moment,] I don’t want to go.  All these changes, all the work of this year-long goodbye.  Letters, prayer cards, friend-raising, presentations, decluttering, de-stuffing, rent or sell?, storing, packing, decision-making.  Prayer.

Come be with me, Daddy.  Hold my hand.  Wait, it’s clinging to my kitchen counter with all its strength.  Peel back the fingers, lovingly, one by one, and fill them with Yourself.  Help me again to want what You want.  To trust the plans You have for our family.  Give me kisses for orphan faces, momma-bear hugs for their hurts, and laughter for their antics.  Give me tender wisdom to guide team members out of their comfort zones and warm grace to welcome them in as friends.  Give me Your love for them all, and for myself.  Wrap me up in it.  Your banner over me is love.  You are good, and like David in the waiting, I will trust in You.  Let my soul glorify the Lord.

His love over each of us is brilliant.

I lift up my eyes to the mountains –
where does my help come from?
 My help comes from the Lord,
the Maker of heaven and earth.

 He will not let your foot slip –
he who watches over you will not slumber;
 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.

 The Lord watches over you –
the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.

 The Lord will keep you from all harm –
he will watch over your life;
 the Lord will watch over your coming and going
both now and for evermore.  Psalm 121


8 comments

  1. “And the voice of truth, tells me a different story. The voice of truth, says ‘Do not be afraid’ and the voice of truth says ‘This is for my glory’. Out of all the voices calling out to me, I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth.” – Heard this the other day and was a great reminder! Praying for God to give you peace and I KNOW you’ll do GREAT things in His name!!!!

  2. That Psalm was one of the two my Great-Grandma chose for her funeral, her favorite. I find myself running to it as well, knowing that if a woman so wise found it encouraging and comforting, I can’t go wrong. It should be the mantra of all of our lives to want what God wants, in each and every area of life. But it is oh. so. hard. to do that. I have faith though, that you and I WILL get there, no matter how long it takes. He won’t let our feet slip.

  3. Your banner over me is love! I appreciate the way you paired that truth with the umbrella. I remember that day was a wet, rainy one and as we left our rooms to go explore the town we knew we had better take it with us; the rain in that area is heavy and frequent at times. Just like the rain in Costa Rica is our lives on planet Earth, we can expect some rain (pain), even heavy ones, sudden storms that can leave us drenched through, cold and soggy, wondering why we didn’t take our umbrella with us. For His children though, God holds His love over us at all times, like a Father would hold for a child. We don’t have to actually lug the umbrella around with us because he watches over us and keeps us from harm, by His love.

  4. Dear Kris and Matt, I couldn’t help but click on the link to your blog in your email about what to bring to the lunch at Doug’s today. My eyes scanned the topics you have touched and Psalm 121 jumped out at me. Greg and I recite this psalm daily. It gives us great comfort and so we have adopted it as our couple’s prayer for Costa Rica. With no home yet here and a rugged unnavigable old road to the finca we purchased 10 years ago, we are praying mightily for God’s help to figure out what we are to do about building our home. Anyway, I just wanted to say that I love that Psalm too! I am encouraged by your blog, because I have procrastinated about writing and if you can do it while mothering, wife-ing, and home schooling, as well as the myriad of other duties you must have in your ministry, I feel like I can get started. We are glad we met and you will be in our prayers.


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